STAYING in a hospice and receiving end of life care does not have to be frightening.

This is the message from Joss Murray, a community palliative care nurse for Forest Holme Hospice in Poole, who spends her days helping dying people and those battling with life-limiting illnesses.

And as part of National Hospice Awareness Month she spoke to the Daily Echo about the poignant journey such patients go on – and how the experience does not have to be as daunting as many often think.

“We have a lot of choices in life,” she said. “We choose what we eat, what jobs we do and what we do every day when we get up - but we have very little choice about the end of our life and a lot of people are very frightened about it and won’t talk about it. By talking about it in a healthy and supportive way, however, it can hopefully become less frightening.”

Central to Joss’ message is that Forest Holme is not like a hospital. Instead it is tranquil, homely and full of life - somewhere sympathy and compassion can be experienced from professionals who really do understand.

“Of course it still has hospital equipment,” she said. “But it is very unlike a hospital – you will hear people laughing, young children squealing and families enjoying themselves. This is not a sad place but, yes, sad things do happen here.

“It is a time in their life when people are perfectly entitled to not want to talk to anyone. They still cry and get upset, but they don’t just cry, they also talk about their past, their hopes. Everything doesn’t suddenly stop because someone is dying. They are still the same person they have always been.”

Joss said she has met some inspiring and brave patients, making her job rewarding and not the bleak toil some might imagine. However, she added that although the nurses always maintain complete professionalism, it can still sometimes be hard not to feel the upset of seeing someone you have cared for die - and staff have to be there to support each other too.

“It can be all sorts of things that get you,” she said. “It could be the family setting is similar to your own, it could be the person you are looking after reminds you of your grandpa. And so many people are just loveable and you want to do your best for them.”

Joss and her 17-year-old daughter Georgie are doing a sponsored walk across the Great Wall of China in aid of Forest Holme later this year. For more information, visit justgiving.com/joss-georgie. For more information about Forest Holme, visit forestholmehospice.org.uk.