I'm late in writing my entry for this month, things have been a bit hectic. On the Tuesday of half term (31st) I went to Ward 10 for my usual day 8 blood test (bloods taken 8 days after chemo to check white blood cell levels) & to have my tunnel line flushed (where they flush my line through with saline & something else to help prevent infection).

I mentioned that the site where the line came out of my chest was feeling sore & had been a bit mucky that morning. I told them I was due to go on holiday on Saturday & didn't want to have to worry about an infection when I was away, the doctor prescribed some anti-biotics to take as a precautionary measure.

Within two hours of that blood test I was shivering & shaking, I was so cold I had to wrap myself in a duvet & still couldn't get warm. I slept the afternoon away & still felt awful when I woke.

I took my temperature at 37.7 it was a little high but not above the danger level. I phoned Ward 10 anyway because I felt so rough & they told me to go in via A&E - not fun!

By the time I got to the hospital my temperature was 38.5 which is above the danger level, the Dr said my blood results from that morning indicated my white blood count was low which is probably why the infection took hold. I was what they call Neutropenic Sepsis, which is a fever/infection caused by low white cells, in turn caused by my chemotherapy drugs.

I had to stay in hospital for two days whilst they pumped me full of intravenous anti-biotics, they had to take my tunnel line out which meant they had to cannulate me through my veins which was pretty horrendous & I had some nice bruises on my hands and arms as a result.

I have to say though, I was very well looked after, the Drs explained exactly what was going on and the nurses couldn't do enough to make me comfortable. Nevertheless, I was still thrilled to get home on Thursday teatime!

My time in hospital meant I only had one day to get ready for our holiday! Kev & Mum had made a start for me but I do like to take control & make sure everything is done my way (properly!) We had a lovely week in Weymouth, I made a really quick recovery and felt so well all week. We did the usual touristy things - Monkey World, SeaLife Centre etc and enjoyed some proper quality family time.

It's funny how on holiday is the only time we ever feel like a 'normal' family. It's because no one around us knows my situation, we don't have to think about hospital appointments or scans and because I can cope with our holiday routine so don't have to rely on others to help out. It was a fantastic week and as always I was sad to come home.

Coming home however meant finding out that my latest CT scan showed that my cancer is still stable. My consultant told me that there is actually very little cancer in my body. This is so fantastic to hear but is also so frustrating, if that's the case why can't they just get rid of it completely????

It is also really ironic that it's the treatment that makes me feel sick and tired and grumpy, that makes my feet so sore and my mouth dry, that causes blood clots in my nose and pins & needles in my finger tips.

The cancer isn't making me ill at all, but if I don't take the drugs then the cancer will grow and then I'd be really poorly. When you look at the options I suppose the side effects aren't that bad really!

I was shocked and upset when I heard that the Dr who'd been treating me from the very beginning of my journey left Bournemouth hospital last week, meaning he was treating me when I was on the ward and failed to mention it was his last week. It really threw me to hear he'd gone for good and didn't say goodbye to me.

I felt we'd developed quite a rapport and I trusted his advice and believed he knew what he was doing with regards to my treatment. Now I have to meet a new Dr and develop a new relationship. I know people leave & move on all the time...but he could have said goodbye.

I've so much to say this time, thanks to those who are still with me. Yesterday I had an unpleasant experience, I was walking out of my front gate with Megan (4yrs), and a young lad (8/9yrs) was approaching on his scooter, he paused as we stepped into the pavement, looked at me & said "Uh oh, here come the cancer kids" and then whizzed off, it all happened so quickly I didn't have time to respond or react but it really shook me up.

I know what he said wasn't nasty as such but it was intended to intimidate. I guess he recognised my face from stories & pictures I've done for the Echo. I have always believed that the bits I've done for the Echo are such a positive thing for myself and the girls.

I thought the fact that we talk about my situation openly was a good thing for the girls because I want them to know they don't need to be scared of talking about it, but now I'm wondering if I've been naive, I feel sick at the thought that they may be teased because of me. I know how cruel kids can be and I guess it is something we will have to deal with at some point.

I had a chat with Leah last night just to reassure her that if anyone was being horrible to her she must always tell an adult who she trusts and she listed several names of people she would talk to & she also reassured me that no one is being nasty to her. The responsibility of being a parent is so huge isn't it?

Finally... I want to make one last plea for sponsorship. On Sunday Leah, Megan and myself (along with Mum, Sis, Aunties & friends) are doing the CRUK Race for Life, click here if you can spare a couple of ££££ for a very worthy cause.

Thanks for reading, it would be great to see loads of you down at the pier on Sunday morning 11am cheering on all the wonderful ladies doing the R4L.