VICTORIA Beckham appears in public with three-year-old Harper sucking a dummy and is accused of ‘putting her daughter’s wellbeing at risk’.

Eh? Someone described as a pregnancy expert sniffed that Harper’s speech could be ‘at risk’ and the soother could ‘misalign’ her teeth.

Given that the Beckhams’ net worth is that of a small African state, I should think the cost of braces for their children was the least of their problems.

Teeth can be fixed. However, as a mother-of-four, Vic knows that there is nothing on God’s earth that will comfort or quieten a grouchy, distracted toddler who just wants its dummy. So, sensibly, she’s given in to it.