COLUMNIST and trained counsellor Fiona Caine answers another set of reader dilemmas.

I AM A CHILDREN’S MENTAL HEALTH NURSE AND NOT SURE HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN COPE

I am a children’s mental health nurse and have been working such long days, seven days a week, since before Christmas. Today, I’ve taken a day off and while I’m happy sitting here in my PJs, I’m filled with stress as I wonder how the kids and their families are coping.

All through this past year, we have been flat-out. It was tough enough before, but now I feel crushed and useless.

I know I need to change things in order to support my own mental health. I’m not sure how much longer I can cope.

FIONA SAYS: PLEASE LOOK AFTER YOU TOO

I am very sorry that you are having to work so hard and yet feel so unappreciated. I know there is little I can say to help because I can’t wave a magic wand. Your email is a reminder to us all to be kind.

Your employer must be aware that you are working too hard - you are risking burning yourself out, but because you so obviously care, you keep going. That isn’t fair, or healthy or sustainable, and they have a duty of care to look after you better than they are doing.

You are clearly being kind to others - but you really do need to be kind to yourself too. We simply cannot look after others effectively, if we don’t look after ourselves first. Please, take a break, otherwise you won’t be there to help those who need you.

I LOVE BEING A MUM BUT DON’T KNOW WHO I AM ANY MORE

My little girl is almost 15 months and is going through a separation anxiety phase, which is very draining for me as she only wants me. She shares our bed as she’s been a terrible sleeper since birth. I love her more than anything but do find myself wishing she would just sleep on her own, so I can get a bit of time with my husband of an evening.

I love being a mum but I don’t know who I am any more, and no longer feel like ‘me’.

FIONA SAYS: THIS IS A NORMAL - BUT CHALLENGING - PHASE OF PARENTING

It’s really hard coping with a small baby, as any mum knows - but doing it without the support of friends, family and other social groups right now, makes it much harder. I’m not surprised you feel you’re struggling.

As to feeling like you again, I don’t think any of us feel ‘normal’ right now, but once it’s safe and we’re all allowed out a bit more, dress yourself up and meet friends, if only for a socially distanced coffee.