It's a shock to the cistern (From Bournemouth Echo)

It's a shock to the cistern

11:00am Monday 9th February 2009

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AFTER a very long absence from using them, I found myself in the normally unenviable position of having to use traditional public toilets recently.

Luckily, I was in a very pretty Lake District lakeside town and the loos had very recently been cleaned and deodorised.

All the necessary items anyone would require for a fulfilling public convenience experience were in place.

There was hot water, paper towels and, somewhat confusingly, a large pay-as-you-weigh scales.

Of course I was surprised. None of us actually wants to use council-run public loos, but when the need arises, it is a shock to find that you’re not wallowing in a couple of inches of fetid water and usually there’s no water, no paper and no way that you’ll feel clean until you’ve had a shower back at home.

I have sympathy with the authorities.

Who wouldn’t feel totally frustrated at spending time and money providing such a public service only to find that its users – and more likely its abusers – wreck your efforts within hours.

All of us feel considerably more expectant of high standards in privately-run premises, whether they’re pubs, restaurants or stores.

But do these premises really want non-customers trooping in and out of the premises, especially when the idiot minority are potentially going to create more problems that forget to flush the chain?

In certain circumstances, it is better, both socially and financially, to close down certain public toilets.

But I can’t see a queue of traders starting to form to join the scheme.

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