AS CONCERN grows for the welfare of the UK’s former servicepeople the way post traumatic stress can affect former soldiers has been laid bare in a new book.

Harry Beaves served with the Army for 34 years, spending much of his time with 148 Battery based at Hamworthy. During a tour of Northern Ireland in 1972 two of his comrades were blown up by the IRA. “One was shredded – the device was packed with nuts and bolts – and the other died on his way to hospital,” he says. “I firmly believed I was the person who should have been blown up and suffered with survivor’s guilt.”

This feeling came on top of a state of ‘hyper vigilance’ – behaviour necessary to keep on top of terrorist threats but which was completely inappropriate for civilian life.

“For four months I was living in a state where I had to be constantly aware that someone was likely to do something very nasty to me,” he says. After leaving the forces he realised that civilians didn’t have the same attitudes. “You don’t get the same bonhomie, you don’t get the same understanding and work ethic,” he says.

As the PTSD closed in, Harry found himself unable to make simple decisions. “I’d go to watch a rugby game wearing my normal sturdy shoes. Then I’d take a pair of walking boots in case it was wet and in case the sturdy shoes pinched, I’d bring a third pair as well,” he says. “I always had to have a plan if things went wrong and eventually I couldn’t even go out to watch rugby because there were traffic lights on the way and I had this paranoia about being caught in a situation I couldn’t get out of.”

After having no success with the NHS Harry tried EMDR – eye movement desensitisation and reprocessing – a new therapy which he credits with putting his life back on track, so much so that he’s been able to write his autobiography, Down Among the Weeds.

Now he wants to spread the message that EMDR can help PTSD which – if untreated – can spiral into other problems, such as homelessness. “I went to a funeral recently and met some old friends who were particularly concerned that the Army doesn’t deal with it very well at all,” he says.

*Down Among the Weeds by Harry Beaves is published by troubadour.co.uk