1:00pm Sunday 6th July 2008
By Emma Joseph
AS any new mum will testify, looking after a baby is tough. When you have two, or even more, it's a whole different ball game.
The first few months of Ruby and Poppy Kerr's lives were a blur to mum Helen.
"I spent three hours feeding," she remembers.
"There were eight feeds a day, 16 bottles a day and I had to sterilise twice a day because I was bottle-feeding.
"They always say to mums sleep when baby's sleeping', but with two you just don't get that chance.
"It was a big adjustment."
The girls are now two and Helen, from Charminster, has returned part-time to her job as cabin crew for Virgin.
But life is still tough.
"They climb everything, so I can't even leave them to go and hang the washing out," she said.
"They love each other to bits, but the next minute they'll be pulling each other's hair out."
Helen's salvation has been the Bournemouth and District Twin Club.
Set up in 1980 by the mother of identical twin girls, the club now runs three day groups, meetings for mums, ante-natal classes, post-natal support and family outings, a website and regular newsletter.
"Having two babies at the same time does provide a lot of practical problems," explained Anna Raisin, who now runs the club.
"But there are also good things. We are really fed up with people being negative when people are expecting twins - saying oh, double the trouble' and things like that.
"It's as if you've been touched by the devil. But we want to say, actually, it is really hard work in the first six months but after that it's really good and there are actually advantages to having two at the same time."
The club was aiming to promote its awareness during national Twins, Triplets and More Week, which ended yesterday, as well as this year's 30th anniversary of the national Twins and Multiple Births Association, to which it is affiliated.
Anna is a mum to non-identical twin girls herself, so knows exactly what the members are going through, and that's part of the club's appeal.
"For a lot of people it's about moral and social support," said Anna, from Throop.
"It's saying, this is a great place to meet other people that are in the same boat as you. Sometimes you get a mum come along in tears and we offer her support, other times they just have a coffee and a chat.
"The twins can enjoy being twins - everybody is the same. Nobody cares that you've got two kids that look the same, because they all have."
There is a much higher incidence of post-natal depression in mums of twins, as well as health problems in the babies themselves as they are often born prematurely.
Anna is keen to get in touch with all twin mums and make sure they know they're not alone, whether they choose to attend a group or not.
"The most important job is probably the ante-natal, but we give people post-natal support as well.
"There's a couple of us that phone people - anybody that we know that's got twins. Some people say they're fine, but I've got another mum that's got post-natal depression.
"Just really saying to people that there's a lot of support out there - just come and get it."
That support proved vital to Amanda Simmonds, from Wimborne, who suffered post-natal depression after having twins Kate and Lucie, now two.
"It was awful," she remembers.
"I've got Ned, who's four, so I had him at home as well. I had some help, but I got post-natal depression from just coping with the three of them.
"It is a bit better now, but it's still very hard work.
"I've been coming here for about nine months and it's the best playgroup I come to. Kate and Lucie get to mix with other sets of twins and see that they're not different.
"Also it's nice to see other twin mums and see that your twins are the same as others with the fighting and things."
As well as the support and advice, many of the mums develop wonderful friendships through their membership of the group.
Anna admits her social life has "gone through the roof" since she had her twins three years ago.
"It's just great to be part of that little community," she said.
"So many people have just made so many really great friends and felt really supported."
To find out more, visit bournemouthtwins.co.uk or tamba.org.uk or call Anna Raisin on 01202 468132 or 07791 300563.
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