MILDLY annoying isn’t even close. Workmen shouldn’t blame their tools, but a writer can blame his laptop.

An original ‘Underwood’ typewriter has been pensioned off in place of another manual typewriter, for a two-year-old laptop. Hard copy it’s now termed, A4 paper in reality.

Filing cabinets served perfectly, yet this darned laptop has lost my 1,000 hours or so, along with the originality, of the work. Had no problem with floppy disks, like vinyl, they were the best?

At age 66 and with far too high an IQ, I’m retired, but as a lifelong journalist, I’m damned if I can stop writing.

My top writers are Stephen King, Faith Eckersall and many more mentors. With this adrenaline for work and fastidious appetite for our English language, you can see my problem. No, it’s not the lost 21 pages of A4, it is the Multiple Sclerosis! Due to this ‘fatal illness’, a brain and muscle-destroying condition such as this has caused the typewriters, despite still in working order, to be redundant.

Many an employer, as they watched me touch-type, asked, due to this ‘speed,’ if there happened to be a fire extinguisher handy? Can anyone gis a job, please? As Yosser Hughes asked? Anything would be considered, as long as there are no time constraints. Fatigue is common with we MS folks. Multiple Sclerosis is ‘Death Row’, but never knowing when we’ll enjoy our Last Supper.

Despite my obvious Amazon credentials, personal and Government pensions, Jane and I are still struggling, so, do you know anywhere requiring a paid wheelchair-bound journalist, please? Qualifications, impeccable!

ALAN BURRIDGE

Blandford Road, Upton, Poole