UPDATED: Attempted child abduction at Primark in Poole: what really happened

A mum reported a "suspicious incident" after a man approached her daughter in Poole's Primark yesterday, it has been revealed.

The concerned mum says her child was approached by a man while she was shopping at Primark in the Dolphin Centre on Wednesday afternoon around 3pm.

The mother reported the matter to security staff at the store and the police were called by Primark, she said.

When asked by the Echo, Dorset Police, the Dolphin Centre and Primark all denied that the incident had taken place.

But the Echo tracked down the mum, from Canford Heath, who was shopping for shoes for her three-year-old when the incident happened.

She said: “She was sitting on the bench trying on shoes.

“I carried on looking for another pair of shoes for her. I looked up, there was a male in front of me. He approached her. I went up behind him, he went 'hello' to her.”

She said the man, who was in his 30s and wearing a flat cap looked right and left and behind, then went off when he saw her. 

“It was highly suspicious,” she said. However the man did not touch or attempt to grab her daughter, she said.

“It really shook me up,” she said. “I just feel it could have been worse. I have three children and this has never happened to me before.”

The incident has spread around Facebook after a friend of the mum posted an update warning other parents to be careful.

A spokesman for Primark said: “Primark takes customer safety very seriously and as such immediately reported the mother’s concerns to the police. On this occasion, having reviewed the CCTV the police did not take any further action.”

The Echo has asked police for an updated response and will post it as soon as we get it.

 

 

 

Comments(70)

angelface4631 says...
12:00pm Thu 14 Mar 13

this is an absolute lie is all I have to say. Why don't you print the truth!

angelface4631 says...
12:01pm Thu 14 Mar 13

but then printing the REAL story about what really happened wouldnt make people read it enough would it!

spell101 says...
12:20pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Q: Why is Facebook a great site for loners?

A: Because it's the only place where they can talk to a wall and not be considered an loser!

scrumpyjack says...
12:36pm Thu 14 Mar 13

angelface4631 wrote:
but then printing the REAL story about what really happened wouldnt make people read it enough would it!
Why don't you tell us the 'real' story?

spooki says...
12:41pm Thu 14 Mar 13

These days I'm afraid I'm more likely to beleive the original story about some weirdo. It would be nice if there weren't any but sadly, that's not reality is it? Who to believe?

angelface4631 says...
12:50pm Thu 14 Mar 13

scrumpyjack wrote:
angelface4631 wrote:
but then printing the REAL story about what really happened wouldnt make people read it enough would it!
Why don't you tell us the 'real' story?
I cant as the police are dealing with it

angelface4631 says...
12:51pm Thu 14 Mar 13

spell101 wrote:
Q: Why is Facebook a great site for loners?

A: Because it's the only place where they can talk to a wall and not be considered an loser!
this is serious its not rumour on fb

CourtOffside says...
1:11pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Prove it, or you're just another malicious scaremongering troll.

Sam Shepherd says...
1:20pm Thu 14 Mar 13

angelface4631 wrote:
scrumpyjack wrote:
angelface4631 wrote:
but then printing the REAL story about what really happened wouldnt make people read it enough would it!
Why don't you tell us the 'real' story?
I cant as the police are dealing with it
Angelface, the police have told us categorically that they are not dealing with it, so if you know differently we need you to help us by giving us some more info.
I emailed you earlier, so you can reply in confidence with anything that might help.
Thanks

mrpickles69 says...
1:21pm Thu 14 Mar 13

i dont see why 3 different sources would lie and say its not true if it was? very confussing then

hamworthygirl says...
2:07pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Theres always rumours of abuction by men in vans/on the beach, Ive seen the same stories on FB in australia. Trouble is when we will know whats true or not? i never post or share anything to be honest im always wary.

static kill says...
2:47pm Thu 14 Mar 13

UPDATED: Man says hello to girl.

Mike_French says...
2:58pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Surely ANY attempt by such a person, male or female should be taken seriously, very sadly this is the world we live in now.
IF (I say if being without children through choice) a stranger approached my son/daughter when shoe shopping in the way that has been reported then he/she would not have got out of the shop with nobody noticing, besides they do have CCTV or am I wrong??

The Renegade Master says...
2:59pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Since when has saying hello to a three year old been a crime or deserving of a headline in the local press? No attempt was made to snatch or touch the child so all we have here is the over reaction of a mother to someone doing absolutely nothing wrong. This story is ridiculous scare mongering drivel in my opinion that should be removed from the site immediately in light of the fact that the Police taking no action whatsoever.

Holland82 says...
3:02pm Thu 14 Mar 13

static kill wrote:
UPDATED: Man says hello to girl.
Mountain out of a mole hill?

Time_Traveller says...
3:03pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Oh this is just ridiculous scare mongering! The guy just said hello to the child - that is being friendly, not attempting to abduct her ffs!

He didn't touch her or attempt to take her away as it said on facebook yesterday. This is just a paranoid mother making something out of nothing in my opinion.

People talk to my grandkids quite often in shops when standing at the tills etc and say hello and my kids will say hello back. It's just being friendly - and my grandkids know not to go off with anyone else.

Do we really want our kids growing up so paranoid that they can't even look at strangers without thinking every one is a pervert?

Jesus, what a world we live in!

Sam Shepherd says...
3:07pm Thu 14 Mar 13

The Renegade Master wrote:
Since when has saying hello to a three year old been a crime or deserving of a headline in the local press? No attempt was made to snatch or touch the child so all we have here is the over reaction of a mother to someone doing absolutely nothing wrong. This story is ridiculous scare mongering drivel in my opinion that should be removed from the site immediately in light of the fact that the Police taking no action whatsoever.
We appreciate the point, but we've updated the story in light of the confusion about what actually happened - we feel it's important to clarify because so many people have seen both the original Facebook post and our story saying it wasn't true.

We don't yet know if the police are taking any action - we do know that they have spoken to the mum today and will update when we know more.

bourne free says...
3:19pm Thu 14 Mar 13

So you cant say Hello to a child
What a cr-p story, which is why the police arn't interested !

johnny j says...
3:24pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Hello, nice weather today.
Its a shame we dont talk anymore!
Enough said really.

Dilligaf08 says...
3:26pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Sam Shepherd wrote:
The Renegade Master wrote:
Since when has saying hello to a three year old been a crime or deserving of a headline in the local press? No attempt was made to snatch or touch the child so all we have here is the over reaction of a mother to someone doing absolutely nothing wrong. This story is ridiculous scare mongering drivel in my opinion that should be removed from the site immediately in light of the fact that the Police taking no action whatsoever.
We appreciate the point, but we've updated the story in light of the confusion about what actually happened - we feel it's important to clarify because so many people have seen both the original Facebook post and our story saying it wasn't true.

We don't yet know if the police are taking any action - we do know that they have spoken to the mum today and will update when we know more.
There are far too many rumours flying around Facebook so The Echo are right in reporting what really happened.

CourtOffside says...
3:50pm Thu 14 Mar 13

If the Echo is going to go around debunking every piece of bullspit that is posted on Facebook, they're going to make themselves very very busy.

jemima36 says...
3:51pm Thu 14 Mar 13

A mothers instinct knows when something is 'off'

l'anglais says...
3:53pm Thu 14 Mar 13

CourtOffside wrote:
If the Echo is going to go around debunking every piece of bullspit that is posted on Facebook, they're going to make themselves very very busy.
What do you think fills up your tabloids every day?

CourtOffside says...
3:58pm Thu 14 Mar 13

What form did this "approach" take? If he'd have knelt or squatted in front of her I'd agree there may have been something to be concerned about. If he's just walking through the shop, sees a lone child and just stops and says hello I'd agree that the mother is being irrationally paranoid.

dutyfree2833 says...
4:32pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Quite clearly no offences have boeen committed nor attempted. There is nothing here to warrant Facebook postings which the author must have known would cause a feeding frenzy (amongst the bottom feeders at least).
What exactly was posted? Someone said hello to my friends toddler then looked around? Was the author trying to cause some sort of situation for attention or to cause a headline? It seems that the shop, the centre security and police are struggling to find an incident so really how can a warning genuinely be posted on Facebook? If genuinely concerned for her childs safety, I wonder why the mother didn't say something to the man?
You cannot blame the Echo for reporting such events and eventually the truth will out. However it Is a sad Inditement of our super sensitive, often hysterical, society when someone cannot say hello to a child without wondering whether their description may end up on the front page of the Echo; Facebook or worse!

simcal says...
4:42pm Thu 14 Mar 13

I see a kid and I smile at them. I'll think twice in future.

Lucy28 says...
5:20pm Thu 14 Mar 13

If I was walking through a shop and saw a 3 year old child sat on a chair without the mum next to her I would probably look left and right and behind me, to look for the adult that was supposed to be with her, and if this child looked at me I would probably smile and god forbin I may even say hello and if the mum came into view with the next pair of shoes to try on and I would carry on my day - I would look around to make sure the mum was there and that the child hadnt wandered off. You know what though had I been in primart and be the one to say hellos to the child most likely on seeing the mum we would have exchanged knowing looks and nothing more would have come of it because I'm a women. It's a sad state of affairs that a man cannot speak to a child without someone believing there is something sinister behind it

mysticalshoelace says...
5:21pm Thu 14 Mar 13

So some poor bloke's out shopping and sees a toddler left on it's own, he says hello probably to check she's ok and then looks around him wondering where the parents are. How is this even in the news ????!!!

Azphreal says...
5:24pm Thu 14 Mar 13

I have said hello to children but think i may stop as an accusation like this against someone can really screw their life up. If it is proved that this man had innocently said hello to the child for no reason apart from being friendly will the mother be saying sorry on social media or this paper?

AmsterdamMan says...
5:33pm Thu 14 Mar 13

If this woman is so ready to castigate a man for saying hello to her unattended child, maybe she ought to castigate herself for enabling the child to be unattended.

BackOfTheNet says...
5:55pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Has society now reached the point where a man cannot even speak to a child without soembody pointing the finger?

Very sad day.

spooki says...
6:26pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Hello? Is there anyone living in reality out there? EVERY day there are stories about pervs and weirdos yet when one MAY have been stopped and deterred the poor woman gets ridiculed? Surely these days a lot of people would err on the side of caution? I suppose if it was your 3 year old being approached you'd merrily let them wonder off with the man so she could see his puppies? I'd like to think my child (2yrs) wouldn't be unattended for a second buts lets face it, shopping with a small child gets fraught and sometimes we do look away for a fraction of a second. Who out there honestly has NEVER looked away from their child in a shop? Yes perhaps she may have over reacted but who knows what could have happened? We would like to think the best of people but I'm sorry, these days it's easier to think the worst first. I dont know if I would have gone to security but who knows. Think about what YOU would have done in the mums position. I frankly couldn't care less what any of you poo-pooers think, my child comes first.

The Warlock says...
6:42pm Thu 14 Mar 13

spooki wrote:
Hello? Is there anyone living in reality out there? EVERY day there are stories about pervs and weirdos yet when one MAY have been stopped and deterred the poor woman gets ridiculed? Surely these days a lot of people would err on the side of caution? I suppose if it was your 3 year old being approached you'd merrily let them wonder off with the man so she could see his puppies? I'd like to think my child (2yrs) wouldn't be unattended for a second buts lets face it, shopping with a small child gets fraught and sometimes we do look away for a fraction of a second. Who out there honestly has NEVER looked away from their child in a shop? Yes perhaps she may have over reacted but who knows what could have happened? We would like to think the best of people but I'm sorry, these days it's easier to think the worst first. I dont know if I would have gone to security but who knows. Think about what YOU would have done in the mums position. I frankly couldn't care less what any of you poo-pooers think, my child comes first.
You said poo. lol

rozmister says...
7:03pm Thu 14 Mar 13

spooki wrote:
Hello? Is there anyone living in reality out there? EVERY day there are stories about pervs and weirdos yet when one MAY have been stopped and deterred the poor woman gets ridiculed? Surely these days a lot of people would err on the side of caution? I suppose if it was your 3 year old being approached you'd merrily let them wonder off with the man so she could see his puppies? I'd like to think my child (2yrs) wouldn't be unattended for a second buts lets face it, shopping with a small child gets fraught and sometimes we do look away for a fraction of a second. Who out there honestly has NEVER looked away from their child in a shop? Yes perhaps she may have over reacted but who knows what could have happened? We would like to think the best of people but I'm sorry, these days it's easier to think the worst first. I dont know if I would have gone to security but who knows. Think about what YOU would have done in the mums position. I frankly couldn't care less what any of you poo-pooers think, my child comes first.
There's always been perverts and weirdos - there were when you and I were young and there always will be people were just less aware. Saying these days is pointless its nothing to do with these days its to do with awareness and new channels (Facebook, etc). Adults i didnt know spoke to me out when I was young but I've made it to adulthood without anything untoward happening.

The likelihood of a stranger snatching your child is slim you'd do better to worry about the people you knowingly allow into your children's life.

If this was a serious attempt to abduct a child the police wouldn't mess about. It's more than likely this was a miscommunication or crossed wires.

Lucy28 says...
7:42pm Thu 14 Mar 13

spooki wrote:
Hello? Is there anyone living in reality out there? EVERY day there are stories about pervs and weirdos yet when one MAY have been stopped and deterred the poor woman gets ridiculed? Surely these days a lot of people would err on the side of caution? I suppose if it was your 3 year old being approached you'd merrily let them wonder off with the man so she could see his puppies? I'd like to think my child (2yrs) wouldn't be unattended for a second buts lets face it, shopping with a small child gets fraught and sometimes we do look away for a fraction of a second. Who out there honestly has NEVER looked away from their child in a shop? Yes perhaps she may have over reacted but who knows what could have happened? We would like to think the best of people but I'm sorry, these days it's easier to think the worst first. I dont know if I would have gone to security but who knows. Think about what YOU would have done in the mums position. I frankly couldn't care less what any of you poo-pooers think, my child comes first.
I don't think that it's necessarily the actions of the mum that people have the major problem. If she felt her child was in danger then yes she had every right to tell the store and contact the police. Although in my opinion she totally over reacted, and whilst yes there are paedophiles in society not every man and certainly the vast majority of men would not have a sinister motive behind approaching a lone child in a shop on the average of probability he was merely concerned for her welfare. But like I said if she felt telling the police and the store was what she needed to do then far enough

What shouldn't have happened though was the witch hunt that ensued on Facebook and other media sites that branded this man a pervert, that posted that this was a case of attempted abduction, that warned parents to be vigilant of 30 something males and installed fear in to the few. That shouldn't have happened because nothing actually physically or otherwise happened to this child and when the echo and the police and the store said that nothing happened that was branded as some sort of cover up. Implying that neither the police nor the store had any interest in safeguarding a child if it meant the profits of primark were in jeopardy. In which case the echo had a duty as part of the media to say that the story on Facebook of a child nearly being abducted was untrue because it was Even the mother said that the threat to her child wasn't actual his actions were perserved by her to be a threat and she acted upon that. It's a sad reflection on society to think that had the person been female.

BournemouthMum says...
7:58pm Thu 14 Mar 13

I think it's terribly sad that a man (or woman for that matter) can't say a friendly 'hello' to a child without being accused of being some kind of pervert and it's a sad reflection on society that seemingly innocent actions are met with such cynicism. However there's a reason for that.

When I was on holiday in Greece a few years ago when my son was around 12, I was looking at sunglasses when a middle aged man was staring at my son and looking around furtively, he inched his way forward towards him. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly.

I think there's more to this story and I doubt the mother is embellishing what happened - what would be the point? I hope the occurrence is clarified by the police.

awsokend says...
10:39pm Thu 14 Mar 13

. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly

What are you then mrs
some kind of expert on perverts
sounds like it you know ?

Lawyer007 says...
11:07pm Thu 14 Mar 13

Saying Hello to a child does not constitute an abduction attempt..

See below for the exact wording of the law from the child abduction Act 1984..

Offence of abduction of child by other persons.

(1) commits an offence if, without lawful authority or reasonable excuse, he takes or detains a child under the age of sixteen—

(a)so as to remove him from the lawful control of any person having lawful control of the child; or

(b)so as to keep him out of the lawful control of any person entitled to lawful control of the child.

[F2(2)The persons are—

(a)where the father and mother of the child in question were married to each other at the time of his birth, the child’s father and mother;

(b)where the father and mother of the child in question were not married to each other at the time of his birth, the child’s mother; and

(c)any other person mentioned in section 1(2)(c) to (e) above.

(3)In proceedings against any person for an offence under this section, it shall be a defence for that person to prove—

(a)where the father and mother of the child in question were not married to each other at the time of his birth—

(i)that he is the child’s father; or
(ii)that, at the time of the alleged offence, he believed, on reasonable grounds, that he was the child’s father; or

(b)that, at the time of the alleged offence, he believed that the child had attained the age of sixteen.

portia6 says...
1:07am Fri 15 Mar 13

I firmly believe that a child under 3 or
4 should be safely in a pushchair and
if walking have safety reins. I know it
can be a nightmare shopping with a
young child, but better to be safe than
sorry!

Blob01 says...
1:20am Fri 15 Mar 13

Reading the comments on this website is almost as good as reading the actual paper!

wilkiemini says...
7:22am Fri 15 Mar 13

Has anyone considered the fact that he may have thought the child was left alone and was checking that she was okay, and looking for her mother?
Why why why do we always think the worst of people ESP men?
Paranoid people.....

BournemouthMum says...
8:27am Fri 15 Mar 13

awsokend wrote:
. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly

What are you then mrs
some kind of expert on perverts
sounds like it you know ?
Correct. I am a bit of an expert on pervs, having been the victim of a couple of them when in my teens. I know how these people operate and can spot them a mile off. Around 10 years ago, I warned one of my friends about a neighbour of hers and warned her not to have anything to do with him and especially don't let her children near him. She thought I was bonkers because he was a respectable looking guy with a good job, nice home etc. anyway long story short he turned out to be a pervert and was convicted of having extensive child **** on his computer (as was reported in the Echo). I just knew.

Maybe the mother in this article has the same sixth sense? I believe her.

BournemouthMum says...
8:29am Fri 15 Mar 13

The filtered word in my post was p.o.r.n.

ashleycross says...
8:43am Fri 15 Mar 13

When I moved to Poole 20+ years ago social services where I was warned me that it was a town notorious for at least ten known paedophile rings operating. I was also warned about a certain celebrity now in the news both in the 70's via someone in TV and then social services in another part of the country in the 80's. It seems to be only now that their victims who have survived these people are being listened to. In the meantime, better safe than sorry.

ashleycross says...
8:48am Fri 15 Mar 13

wilkiemini wrote:
Has anyone considered the fact that he may have thought the child was left alone and was checking that she was okay, and looking for her mother?
Why why why do we always think the worst of people ESP men?
Paranoid people.....
If this was the case he should have reported it to a member of staff and would also not have behaved suspiciously by looking all around him to see if anyone was watching him.

Dorset Logic says...
8:55am Fri 15 Mar 13

Man says Hello to Kid, Mother runs out of cotton wool to wrap kids up in.


'Will someone please think of the children'

SophieRJ says...
9:37am Fri 15 Mar 13

portia6 wrote:
I firmly believe that a child under 3 or
4 should be safely in a pushchair and
if walking have safety reins. I know it
can be a nightmare shopping with a
young child, but better to be safe than
sorry!
This is why so many kids are obese! A child of 3 or 4, who is perfectly capable of walking, should be walking!!

Dibbles2 says...
9:50am Fri 15 Mar 13

BournemouthMum wrote:
awsokend wrote:
. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly

What are you then mrs
some kind of expert on perverts
sounds like it you know ?
Correct. I am a bit of an expert on pervs, having been the victim of a couple of them when in my teens. I know how these people operate and can spot them a mile off. Around 10 years ago, I warned one of my friends about a neighbour of hers and warned her not to have anything to do with him and especially don't let her children near him. She thought I was bonkers because he was a respectable looking guy with a good job, nice home etc. anyway long story short he turned out to be a pervert and was convicted of having extensive child **** on his computer (as was reported in the Echo). I just knew.

Maybe the mother in this article has the same sixth sense? I believe her.
So how come it was all over fcebook 24 hrs prior to the alleged incident????????????
????????????????????
??? Wasting police time????????????????
??????????

Dibbles2 says...
9:57am Fri 15 Mar 13

ashleycross wrote:
wilkiemini wrote:
Has anyone considered the fact that he may have thought the child was left alone and was checking that she was okay, and looking for her mother?
Why why why do we always think the worst of people ESP men?
Paranoid people.....
If this was the case he should have reported it to a member of staff and would also not have behaved suspiciously by looking all around him to see if anyone was watching him.
Have you seen the size of Primark? Find a member of staff?

wilkiemini says...
10:04am Fri 15 Mar 13

It's not suspicious, looking around? Oh dear silly man for trying to locate her mother! Do me a favour....this story is ridiculous

rozmister says...
10:14am Fri 15 Mar 13

BournemouthMum wrote:
awsokend wrote:
. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly

What are you then mrs
some kind of expert on perverts
sounds like it you know ?
Correct. I am a bit of an expert on pervs, having been the victim of a couple of them when in my teens. I know how these people operate and can spot them a mile off. Around 10 years ago, I warned one of my friends about a neighbour of hers and warned her not to have anything to do with him and especially don't let her children near him. She thought I was bonkers because he was a respectable looking guy with a good job, nice home etc. anyway long story short he turned out to be a pervert and was convicted of having extensive child **** on his computer (as was reported in the Echo). I just knew.

Maybe the mother in this article has the same sixth sense? I believe her.
You may be better than most at spotting sex offenders but I'm a bit sceptical you can spot every one from a mile off.

There isn't one conventional way that all sex offenders behave. There are trends but believing that you can identify ever single one on sight could lead to paedophiles getting away with their behaviour because they don't fit a conventional idea of paedophile type behaviour. Or a child may not be believed when they make an abuse claim because the person doesn't fit the stereotype. I'm not denying you may be able to identify them better than most but we all need to be really careful not to stereotype paedophiles and then miss what's in front of our face. Just look at Jimmy Saville - couldn't be a paedophile in most people's eyes because he was a celebrity and he's one of the most prolific offenders of our time.

As for believing the mum. I believe the mum FELT worried about the man's behaviour I don't however believe or disbelieve her accusation that the man planned to abduct her child. Statistically the chances that he was trying to abduct her child are slim but without being there and seeing what happened I couldn't know. I wouldn't want to make or support such a serious accusation unless I was SURE 110% that person had behaved inappropriately and this report doesn't give me the details to make that judgement.

dutyfree2833 says...
11:03am Fri 15 Mar 13

Can everyone just get a grip. Talk of pedo rings, snatching kids, unfit mothers and the like.

Look, theres no end of reasons why someone may say hello to a kid in a shop on its own. Who knows the motive but the chances of it being sinister are extremely small.

What actually happened here? Nothing!
So get on with your lives and stop making something out of nothing. Ridiculous paranoid society we now live in.

Wesoblind says...
11:22am Fri 15 Mar 13

Why dont people watch there kids? You cant take your eyes off them for second.

Wesoblind says...
11:23am Fri 15 Mar 13

portia6 wrote:
I firmly believe that a child under 3 or 4 should be safely in a pushchair and if walking have safety reins. I know it can be a nightmare shopping with a young child, but better to be safe than sorry!
Thats just lazy they are not a dog, i hold my daughters hand the whole time, simples!

Wesoblind says...
11:25am Fri 15 Mar 13

ashleycross wrote:
When I moved to Poole 20+ years ago social services where I was warned me that it was a town notorious for at least ten known paedophile rings operating. I was also warned about a certain celebrity now in the news both in the 70's via someone in TV and then social services in another part of the country in the 80's. It seems to be only now that their victims who have survived these people are being listened to. In the meantime, better safe than sorry.
Yes but its not some 50 year old man abducting a 3 year old its a 25 year old chav with a 15 year old girlfriend!

afcb_canfordheath says...
11:28am Fri 15 Mar 13

I have a 3 month year old very cute little girl and the amount of people (elderly mainly) always see her and smile and strike up a conversation with me or my partner , the babies mother is ridiculous. I would say at least 10 people a day when we are out , in Poole mainly. If I thought for one minute somebody was going to abduct her then I would take immediate action so to me this is a bit of a non story although I can understand why the mother was confused and worried but at the same time I don't take my eyes off my daughter in her pushchair.

awsokend says...
12:17pm Fri 15 Mar 13

BournemouthMum wrote:
awsokend wrote:
. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly

What are you then mrs
some kind of expert on perverts
sounds like it you know ?
Correct. I am a bit of an expert on pervs, having been the victim of a couple of them when in my teens. I know how these people operate and can spot them a mile off. Around 10 years ago, I warned one of my friends about a neighbour of hers and warned her not to have anything to do with him and especially don't let her children near him. She thought I was bonkers because he was a respectable looking guy with a good job, nice home etc. anyway long story short he turned out to be a pervert and was convicted of having extensive child **** on his computer (as was reported in the Echo). I just knew.

Maybe the mother in this article has the same sixth sense? I believe her.
If any one looks at you or your kids when you are out
take great care
Because they might ****off with them
according to the posters on this thread.
For Petes sake get a life and take your red noses off.

rozmister says...
12:53pm Fri 15 Mar 13

tricky1007 wrote:
rozmister wrote:
BournemouthMum wrote:
awsokend wrote:
. I saw what he was doing from behind the carousel (he didn't see me) and I said to him "don't even think about it" because I knew what he was up to, mothers just do. He walked away sheepishly

What are you then mrs
some kind of expert on perverts
sounds like it you know ?
Correct. I am a bit of an expert on pervs, having been the victim of a couple of them when in my teens. I know how these people operate and can spot them a mile off. Around 10 years ago, I warned one of my friends about a neighbour of hers and warned her not to have anything to do with him and especially don't let her children near him. She thought I was bonkers because he was a respectable looking guy with a good job, nice home etc. anyway long story short he turned out to be a pervert and was convicted of having extensive child **** on his computer (as was reported in the Echo). I just knew.

Maybe the mother in this article has the same sixth sense? I believe her.
You may be better than most at spotting sex offenders but I'm a bit sceptical you can spot every one from a mile off.

There isn't one conventional way that all sex offenders behave. There are trends but believing that you can identify ever single one on sight could lead to paedophiles getting away with their behaviour because they don't fit a conventional idea of paedophile type behaviour. Or a child may not be believed when they make an abuse claim because the person doesn't fit the stereotype. I'm not denying you may be able to identify them better than most but we all need to be really careful not to stereotype paedophiles and then miss what's in front of our face. Just look at Jimmy Saville - couldn't be a paedophile in most people's eyes because he was a celebrity and he's one of the most prolific offenders of our time.

As for believing the mum. I believe the mum FELT worried about the man's behaviour I don't however believe or disbelieve her accusation that the man planned to abduct her child. Statistically the chances that he was trying to abduct her child are slim but without being there and seeing what happened I couldn't know. I wouldn't want to make or support such a serious accusation unless I was SURE 110% that person had behaved inappropriately and this report doesn't give me the details to make that judgement.
how come you never went to the police about Jimmy Saville? Surely if your that good at spotting them, he should have been easy!!!
I never claimed to be any good at identifying paedophiles. BournemouthMum did.

I have a good knowledge of warning signs from being related to the Chief Executive of a charity for victims of abuse but I'd never say I could be sure to identify a paedophile because I wouldn't be confident I could (unless there was clear evidence e.g they'd done something inappropriate in front of me or a child made an accusation). Accusing people of being paedophiles is very serious so as I couldn't be sure without strong evidence I wouldn't.

grazzer says...
1:24pm Fri 15 Mar 13

Personally l would like to thank The Echo for Straightening out the rumours and giving us the true facts

static kill says...
1:28pm Fri 15 Mar 13

It's only us mothers who can spot a pedo when we see one. I went shopping this morning and counted 34 of them. Thank god I left my kids at home!

spooki says...
2:42pm Fri 15 Mar 13

I can't believe there are folk out there who NEVER take their eyes off their children for a fraction of a second??? How on earth do you shop for things? For some reason people without children think its easy to go out with a child and concentrate fully on the child AND what they're doing at every moment. You never look away to read a packet? Or look around for whatever thing it is you've gone in for and they've moved it? In order to try shoes on you have to stand up. That goes for children too. Frankly I'd rather someone reported someone a bit iffy to the store so they were aware of things than just brush it off.
Yes she over reacted but she probably thought she had good reason to. Shame for anyone who is innocently chatting to a child, yet again, the weirdos have ruined it for every 'normal' person.

pabotto says...
3:17pm Fri 15 Mar 13

Ridiculous story and sums up how stupid this country is. I said hello when greeting someone earlier, call the police.

strippervicar says...
4:01pm Fri 15 Mar 13

Here's a molehill, lets see what we can make out of it.

Shameful reporting.

portia6 says...
4:59pm Fri 15 Mar 13

SophieRJ wrote:
portia6 wrote:
I firmly believe that a child under 3 or
4 should be safely in a pushchair and
if walking have safety reins. I know it
can be a nightmare shopping with a
young child, but better to be safe than
sorry!
This is why so many kids are obese! A child of 3 or 4, who is perfectly capable of walking, should be walking!!
Just saying its safer when in a crowded
store, I had a hyper-active one who
would just get lost! Kids hate shopping
especially when they are bored!

paul.p says...
2:02am Sat 16 Mar 13

This world, it's so messed up that I can see the day a law being brought in where all single men have to shop at night when all the kids are in bed.

It's things like this story that really does make me think that the human race is a pointless entity.

portia6 says...
4:16pm Sat 16 Mar 13

The world is full of people who were
once children wonder how we all
survived, please remember Madeline
Mcann.

ShuttleX says...
5:29pm Sat 16 Mar 13

Lucy28 wrote:
If I was walking through a shop and saw a 3 year old child sat on a chair without the mum next to her I would probably look left and right and behind me, to look for the adult that was supposed to be with her, and if this child looked at me I would probably smile and god forbin I may even say hello and if the mum came into view with the next pair of shoes to try on and I would carry on my day - I would look around to make sure the mum was there and that the child hadnt wandered off. You know what though had I been in primart and be the one to say hellos to the child most likely on seeing the mum we would have exchanged knowing looks and nothing more would have come of it because I'm a women. It's a sad state of affairs that a man cannot speak to a child without someone believing there is something sinister behind it
Well said Lucy. Your post just about sums it up. If the event took place, and it's not just a bit of attention seeking by this woman, just what has this man done? No wonder children are more at risk now. Adults, especiailly men, will just walk on by when they see a child alone, even if it's in distress. They feel they don't need the hassle. May'be this woman will keep her children with her next time.
I agree the Echo should have told the story, and it seems they are actually trying to get to the bottom of it, but I have to ask, is there really any story to get to the bottom of?

ashleycross says...
12:21am Mon 18 Mar 13

Dibbles2 wrote:
ashleycross wrote:
wilkiemini wrote:
Has anyone considered the fact that he may have thought the child was left alone and was checking that she was okay, and looking for her mother?
Why why why do we always think the worst of people ESP men?
Paranoid people.....
If this was the case he should have reported it to a member of staff and would also not have behaved suspiciously by looking all around him to see if anyone was watching him.
Have you seen the size of Primark? Find a member of staff?
Fair point-I don't actually shop there so didn't realise. However, a lack of staff would also make it a good place for someone to go for a child. Also, the mother did find a member of staff to report to.

Chris the plumber says...
8:44am Tue 19 Mar 13

Hello, I did`nt know Primark sold shoes!!

Chris the plumber says...
8:44am Tue 19 Mar 13

Hello, I did`nt know Primark sold shoes!!

click2find

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