It’s difficult to know whether the developers recruited family members for the voiceovers here or if its hired professionals were directed to sound unfeasibly wooden.
The script is horrible enough without this hilarious delivery. Our hero sounds like Jason Statham after someone’s pushed their thumb into his frontal lobe. There’s even some swearing, but even this comes off like a choirboy’s first attempt at profanity. He might as well be saying ‘bottom’ and ‘jobbie’.
Nevertheless, I smashed a good three-hour romp in my first sitting, and the longer I spent tottering around the islands looking for my soul (sucked out by a skeleton who burst from a glowing porthole, if you’re asking) the less the script and its school-play blathering bothered me. Indeed I grew rather fond of its amusing oaken stylings, particularly the chap who’s clearly trying to combine Brian Blessed and Matt Berry in one astonishing bellow-full, expressive mess.
There is a host of shabby goings on in Risen 3, not least the ridiculous button configuration (who sets ‘jump’ to triangle?) and idiotic AI movement (during my conversation with one soldier, one of his fellow militia trod on his head, spun in several circles and crept off), but there’s also lot in its favour.
It’s tough. You can’t expect to mow down swathes of ghoulish foes with your wee blade and a pair of fetching undies. I spent most of my early exploring luring enemies towards nearby cohorts who were far better equipped to dispatch them.
And while the silly storyline might be badly delivered, there’s a certain sympathy to be had for its unnamed hero, and the world is varied enough to reward inspection beyond the usual paths.
Look past its (very) rough exterior and the soft, smooshy underbelly will provide warm gaming pleasure.
Out on PC, PS3, Xbox 360