HARRY Redknapp got into hot water when he waded into ‘Bantergate’ this week. But when he’s talking the Beautiful Game, is there anyone better than soccer’s Sage of Sandbanks?

1. On West Ham striker John Hartson: "John Hartson's got more previous than Jack the Ripper."

2. On his former club, West Ham: “Even when they had Moore, Hurst and Peters, West Ham’s average finish was about 17th. It just shows how useless the other eight of us were.”

3. On tactics: "I sorted out the team formation last night lying in bed with the wife. When your husband's as ugly as me, you'd only want to talk football in bed."

4. On the possibility of going to prison after his 2013 court case: “Was I scared of going to prison? Yes I was. You’re relying on 12 people who might not like you. They might have been Arsenal fans for all I knew. One had a stained jacket, for goodness sake.”

5. On a training ground bust-up between West Ham players Alvin Martin and Matthew Rush: "I've seen better fights at a wedding."

6. On West Ham's UEFA Cup chances: "Where are we in relation to Europe? Not too far from Dover."

7. On his love of animals: “I love animals so much, all animals. Apart from cats, I’m a little bit scared of cats.”

8. On missing out on the signing of a global superstar he had on trial at Upton Park: "Andrei Shevchenko didn't pull up any trees."

9. On signing Luther Blissett for Bournemouth: "Before I signed Luther Blissett for Bournemouth, my chairman at the time said, “Harry, they tell me he's over the hill. Why are we signing him?” I said, “He'll score goals.” In his first game he scored four against Hull. After the game the chairman said, “We haven't seen the best of him yet.” I said, “I think we have."

10. On West Ham's Ivory Coast striker Samassi Abou: "He don't speak the English too good."